Pages

Monday, September 17, 2012

Inspiration: How To Achieve Your Dreams!


Think Fast: What’s your favorite quotation? 

If you just answered, “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind,” then congratulations!  I can tell that you’re really socially aware, you read a lot of Gandhi, and that you’re obviously totally original.  But if you weren’t one of the 19% of people who went straight for the eye thing, maybe you’re one of the 27% of people who answered, “Shoot for the moon.  Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”

Dammit, I need to address something.  If you shoot for the moon and miss, you’re not going to land among the stars.  What with there being no gravity in space and all, you might float around for a while, but chances are you won’t have made it up that high anyway.  You’re probably going to fall and die.

Understand, I don’t have a problem with dreams.  Barack Obama inherited dreams from his father, and now he’s President of the United States.  Justin Bieber never stopped beliebing, and now he gets to record songs with Will Smith’s son.  I just have a problem with inspirational quotations about dreams.  I think that they’re stupid.

“I’m a dreamer.  I have to dream and reach for the stars, and if I miss a star then I grab a handful of clouds.”

MIKE TYSON said that.  Because no one seems to scream “I like fluffy white clouds and eating ears” more than this guy:

Photo: deliberationroom.com

Mike Tyson has also been quoted saying, “I’m on the Zoloft to keep from killing ya’ll.”  He has a professed love of pigeons and is obviously a total softy.

“Man is a genius when he is dreaming.”
-Akira Kurosawa

Woman is a genius when she is not retweeting bullshit about dreams.

“If you can dream it, you can become it."
-William Arthur Ward

I dream of being the next Missy Franklin.  Good thing that’ll happen.

“Dreams do come true, if only we wish hard enough.  You can have anything in life if you will sacrifice everything else for it."
-J.M. Barrie

I used to love that quote, until I realized that it is MISERABLY SAD.  It reminds me of that time I left my family and friends to go to a boarding school for the arts where I couldn’t eat.  And then my dream still didn’t come true.  Ha!  Haha!  It’s so funny because it’s not funny at all!  It’s just true!  Moving on.

“Good things come to those who wait.”
-Assumedly some bad mom

I think that proverb is supposed to teach patience, but it’s often applied to dreams in a “Someday-My-Prince-Will-Come” sense.  But waiting for good things to happen, or waiting for your dreams to come true, is a TERRIBLE idea.  Working towards them is a good one.

I grew up believing that if I was passionate and driven and strong, I could do anything I wanted with my life.  It was an unfortunate side effect of having really supportive parents and a 1st grade teacher who believed my love of “Boxcar Children” stories bespoke of unparalleled genius.

But I got tired of dreams not coming true, so I made it my mission to fashion a foolproof method to guarantee that they would:

“I’ve discovered the secret to making all my dreams come true.  The secret is to have really vague dreams."
-Annamal Crackers

Specificity kills dreams.  I just ate a chocolate granola bar, and I enjoyed it.  And you know what?  I have always dreamed of “having enjoyable experiences.”  THAT DREAM CAME TRUE JUST NOW.  It has been my life-long dream to have love in my life.  And guess what?  I have a cat who truly loves me.  BOOM.  Dream achieved.  I dream of good things happening—any good things happening—so that my dreams come true every day. 

“Reach for anything and if anything happens, then you’ll be okay.”

Inspirational.

https://www.facebook.com/AnnamalCrackersBlog
Twitter: @AnnamalHalligan

1 comment: